INCLUDING LGBTQ+ PEOPLE IN THE CONVERSATION AROUND SAME SEX MARRIAGE IN THE church
what is pride in marriage?
Pride in Marriage is a series of online events from The Gathering - Cardiff's. Following the success of the Inclusive Conference in October 2020 our first Pride in Marriage event was put together to continue encouraging churches to have open conversations around LGBTQ+ inclusivity within their faith community. Wherever you are on the journey of LGBTQ+ inclusivity, we pray the videos bellow are helpful.
Pride in Marriage brings the voices and experiences of real LGBTQ+ people to the forefront, providing space for real LGBTQ+ couples to discuss their marriage experience from a faith perspective. We recognise that there are many arguments for and against LGBTQ+ marriage within the church, with hundreds of books, videos, podcasts and resources that argue both ways, and we know all of that can often bring more confusion than clarity. Pride in Marriage aims to simply re-centralise the voice of the people these arguments directly effect.
REAL LGBTQ+ COUPLES
Providing a platform for LGBTQ+ voices is at the heart of Pride in Marriage. Below are three films with real LGBTQ+ couples telling their stories as married couples with a faith.
'It would be a much nicer world if everyone loved each other.'
Ali and Nici have been married for six years and have recently adopted a little boy. They live and
worship in Cardiff. Ali and Nici are firm believers in calm, open, loving conversation in order to reach a common ground.
'It felt impersonal to not have God involved, like there was someone we wanted to invite but couldn’t'
Anna and Nicki have been married for ten years this year and have three children. In their film Anna and Nicki discuss the obstacles they faced around parenthood and marriage and their journey to becoming a family.
'church is a family.
I wanted to get married in front of my church family and that was taken away from me'
Sam and Dan were married in 2020, just before the first lockdown. A year later Sam reflects on journey through church as a gay man and how important finding people to share your faith with is. Dan asked not to be part of the film but has written up his thoughts here.
We understand that one of the best ways for us to come together as a faith family is through open, loving, communication. But we know conversation with LGBTQ+ people in a faith setting can be hard to come by. Many LGBTQ+ people have either experienced or fear rejection and hate from Christians and may choose to stay in the closet at church or decide not to visit one at all. And of course, if you are not LGBTQ+ but want to be an ally it can feel daunting ask questions for fear of "getting it wrong".
As an answer to this, Pride in Marriage hosted a live Q+A on the 17th of April 2021 with the couples from our films. Below is a recording from the panel, we hope you find it helpful in better understanding the huge impact conversations and delays around LGBTQ+ marriage can have on our Queer church family.
with REVD CANOn dr trystan owain hughes
Revd Canon Dr Trystan Owain Hughes is Tutor in Applied Theology at St Padarn’s Institute, Cardiff, vicar of Christ Church, Roath Park, and Canon Theologian at Llandaff Cathedral.
He is the author of 7 books, including Finding Hope and Meaning in Suffering (SPCK 2010), The Compassion Quest (SPCK 2013), and Living the Prayer (BRF 2017).
As a member of the Doctrinal Commission when the 2014 report The Church in Wales and Same-Sex Partnerships was written, Trystan will explore the theology behind Option Three of the report – ‘Marriage as a union of loving equals, irrespective of sexual difference’.